Children take in more than you think. They get information from news programmes, social media and friends and by following the conversations and reactions of adults in relation to the news.
Although children are capable of absorbing many details, they are neither sufficiently mature nor have enough life experience to put together fragments of information in a meaningful way. Children often need the help of an adult to interpret and understand information.
Children may interpret information in ways that can seem overwhelming and scary. Openness and age-appropriate information about world events are important to ensure that children do not have to face such thoughts alone. The aim is to protect your child.
Reassuring your child
It is completely normal to feel scared or insecure when you hear or watch frightening news or find out that something terrible has happened. The best thing you can do as an adult is to talk to your child about what they are afraid of.
Ask your child what they are thinking, listen to them, and acknowledge their feelings
Ask your child what they know about the incident and give them the information they need to understand what has happened. Answer any questions they may have. Try to be as specific as possible in your answers, without giving too many details that could frighten your child. Adapt the information to the age of the child.
Younger children need more concise and specific information, while older children and adolescents are better able to handle larger amounts of information and understand contexts and links.
Every child is different, no matter how old they are, so consider what information the child you are going to talk to needs to know and adapt what you say accordingly. It is important to remember that children and adults may be afraid of different things.
Some children may be interested in talking and may ask about the same things many times over, while others may not want to talk about it. Some children will benefit more from expressing their feelings through play, drawings or stories. Show that you understand and acknowledge your child’s feelings.
When you’re secure, your children will be secure too
When children feel afraid and unsafe, they need to be comforted and reassured. Take some deep breaths and find your own inner calm. Make your children feel safe. This applies to children of all ages.
As regards the youngest children, of kindergarten age, showing them that you feel safe and reassuring them that they are safe too is the most important thing of all.
In the case of older children, from early school age onwards, it will also be important to give them the information they need to know.
Normalise your child’s reactions
Be aware that each child behaves differently. For example, your child may be unable to sleep, or be anxious, angry or sad. Be patient.
Shield children from images in the news intended for adults
Try to avoid showing images or videos of events to the very youngest children. For children of primary school age, NRK’s children’s news (Supernytt) may be useful, while adolescents can watch news intended for adults. Always watch the news with your child/adolescent so that you can talk about what you see.
Talk about how they deal with information about frightening events and where they get their information from.
Help your child to limit the amount of news they watch and how much time is spent on this at home. Children should ideally not use their phone or computer during the last hour before bedtime.
You should also be aware of what adults talk about when children are around in order to avoid scaring them.
Spend time with your child
Do fun things together. Help your child focus on what is happening here and now. This can distract them from their worries.
If your child becomes very anxious, they may have difficulty sleeping. In such cases, it can help to reassure them before bedtime and to practise taking deep breaths in order to relax. It may also help to listen to an audiobook or calming music.
Ask for help if you need it
Children and young people can sometimes react so strongly that they need help. Ask for help if you need it, for example if your child’s strong reactions affect their ability to function or do not pass.